Dean to Tori: 'I can't win!'
'I gave my heart so openly,' says Tori Spelling at the start of episode four on Tuesday of her Lifetime series, True Tori. But, 'I think right now I'm back to being guarded.'
Her hubby, Dean McDermott, has been home from rehab for six days and she's looking at old photos from before he cheated on her in December and their seven year marriage fell apart. 'I just don't know how to get that trust back.'
And then we pick right up where we left off last week - sitting on a patio with a therapist as Tori and Dean have a heated conversation. Dan's holding his head and having a meltdown over his cheating.
'Come back, Dean!' says the therapist. Dean begins to calm down.
But Tori is freaking out, worried that he'll want to hurt himself. He has had suicidal thoughts in the past. But Dean says he's fine.
'He's people-pleasing right now,' says Tori, not believing him. She says she's mad at herself for allowing the filming.
He says she needs to express her feelings.
She agrees. 'I need to feel I can say things that are true. ... I need to be able to tell him everything.'
Dean was working on Chopped: Canada when he cheated and now he has just learned the show was picked up and he has been asked to return to Toronto for two months. He's driving in his car and calls his 'bro,' Wolf, for advice.
Should I go 'back to the scene of the crime?' Dean says.
Wolf says, 'Go do it, be strong, man up.'
Telling Tori, however, 'brings up fear,' says Dean. And with good reason.
He finally tells her. Tori's not happy. Mostly because it's the same week that she has to start shooting Mystery Girls, her ABC Family show with Jennie Garth.
Either way, it looks like she's going to resent him. 'If he chooses to save our marriage and not do it, he ends his career. If he chooses his career, he ruins his marriage. So what do you do?'
Tori and Dean pick up the conversation one night in the kitchen.
'I try to tell you how I feel and this is what happens, you scream and yell,' she tells him.
He does yell. 'It's frustrating. I'm trying my best now.' His voice is getting louder.
'Stop shouting at me!' Tori says.
'What do you (bleeping) want from me?' Dean walks outside. He tells producers, 'I don't think I want to be in this marriage anymore.'
Next, we see them in the therapist's office. Tori is saying that Toronto is filled with negative memories. Dean shuts his eyes. 'Going to the place where it's all a big trigger? Yeah,' says Tori.
Dean says the cheating is over and 'the drinking and drugs - today, I don't want 'em.'
Tori says if he goes, 'Every day I will live in so much fear.'
Says Dean: 'I can't win.' Again, he covers his face with his hand.
Tori then says she wants Dean to 'nuture' her.
'It's going to take some time,' says Dean.
The next day he decides to create something for her. A map. With markings of their special places. He goes to a frame store and unloads on the clerk. 'I did something very unforgivable' so I need this 'yesterday.'
Then he goes to the store to buy two new bearded dragon lizards for the kids. A surprise! The kids seem to like them. And Tori's really happy about it. 'Good job,' she tells Dean, managing a half smile. (Never would have thought that the way to Tori's heart was with bearded dragons, but hey, whatever works.)
The next day the two visit a reiki therapist for some special healing. She asks if this hasn't brought Tori and Dean closer together.
And now, a date night, a 'surprise for Mama,' Dean tells the kids.
'I just thought I'd do a little dinner, a little gesture to make her feel special.' He's making sushi. 'Close your eyes, babe,' he says, presenting her with sushi before the fire.
'Why'd you give me an oyster?' she says. ' 'Cause you think it's an aphrodisiac?'
He gives her some wrapped gifts. 'What's this for?' she says, suspiciously.
'Because I love you!' he says.
The first gift is lavender massage oil.
'It's lubricant,' she says. 'Massage glide lubricant,' she reads on the bottle. (Oops!)
And then he gives her the map. She's pleased. 'I hope this won't stop - when there's a camera not filming,' she tells him.
'I love you. I don't want to lose you. I love you so much,' he says.
'I love you, too,' she whispers, starting to cry. She adds, 'You just have to know. You hurt me. You broke my heart. You humiliated me in front of the world.'
Says Dean: 'I owe you a lifetime of apologizes.'
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